I have decided to try my hand at writing a radio drama inspired by my kids’ latest role-playing session and using techniques learned from reading Michael J. Straczynski’s The Complete Book of Screenwriting. Perhaps Garrett of Threat Detected will air this as written, perhaps not. Either way, it was an excellent experience for me. I hope that you enjoy it. Let me know what you think.
THE LOST TEMPLE
Release the Kraken!
MUSIC: THEME MUSIC/BREAKOUT
SOUND: STARSHIP ENGINE HUM
SOUND: SOLDIER FOOTSTEPS ON METAL FLOOR IN DECRESCENDO
SOUND: STARSHIP DOOR CLOSES
TRISSEN: What the hell…?
MHARRULA: (INTERRUPTS TRISSEN) Shut up, Trissen. I’m not in the mood. We’ve a Bothan to fry.
TRISSEN: Fine! But when this is all over, you are going to explain all this business about you being some sort of royalty.
TORRENT: Yes. I, too, would like to learn more about your relationship with these rangers. It seems that there is much to learn about Trianii societal customs.
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Yeah, with your influence with the rangers, you could help us in finding a droid army for me!
MHARRULA: Don’t even think about it, clanker. There’s not a chance in the universe I’d help you with that. (BEAT) Now, if you boys are done playing ‘Who’s that girl?’, I think we should find the bridge to this starship and pay our respects to the captain.
SOUND: STARSHIP DOOR OPENS
TRISSEN: After you, Miss Kitty.
MHARRULA: (LOW GROWL)
SOUND: FOOTSTEPS ON METAL FLOOR THEN STARSHIP DOOR CLOSES
TRANSITION: FOOTSTEPS ON METAL FLOOR, DARK, MOODY MUSIC
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) My sensors tell me that there is an organic life form beyond this access door.
TRISSEN: Could be our Bothan. Hey, can you make out what the security panel says? It’s written in some sort of alien gibberish.
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) It’s Neimoidian but, it doesn’t make any sense. It’s a warning for personnel not to enter.
TRISSEN: Well, that sounds like an invitation to me. Stand back!
TORRENT: No! Wait!
SOUND: BLASTER FIRE FOLLOWED BY STARSHIP DOOR OPENING
TORRENT: We have a droid for that. You are going to get us all killed.
TRISSEN: What an excellent idea, Jedi. Send a droid! (BEAT) Hey! B1-X! Why don’t you go in and have a look around?
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) (WITH APPARENT JOY) Okay! No problem, guys!
SOUND: METAL FOOTSTEPS ON METAL STAIRCASE DESCENDING
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Ummm, it’s dark down here…(PAUSE) Aaaaaigh!
SOUND: SEVERAL METALLIC OBJECTS CRASHING TO THE FLOOR
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) It’s all right! I’m ok! Let me turn on my torch. (BEAT) Ah, yes. Much better. Uh-oh. Ummm, guys? You might want to have a look at this!
TRISSEN: What is it? Did ya finally find your CPU?
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Uh, no. Well, I don’t think so. That is, unless my CPU is looking at me with its red eyes.
TORRENT: Red eyes? B1-X, maintain your position. We will be down to join you shortly. (BEAT) Trissen, Mharrula, let us proceed cautiously and be on our guard. I sense a malignant force in the chamber with our droid friend.
MHARRULA: You got it.
TRISSEN: Yeah, sure.
SOUND: LIGHTSABER IGNITES, GUNS COCK
SOUND: FOOTSTEPS DESCENDING METALLIC STAIRCASE
MHARRULA: Gagh! What’s that smell? It’s like…smoke, or…rotten eggs or something!
TRISSEN: That’s sulfur, sweetheart. It reminds me of the smell of war. (BREATHES IN) Ahhh, I love it!
TORRENT: You would. Trissen, with your ability to see in the dark you will have to lead. I believe that the bright spot light ahead is that of B1-X’s head-mounted torch. If I am not mistaken, some distance farther I can make out two more lights, blood red in color. These are the ‘eyes’?
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Yep, that’s right Torrent. And they’re creepin’ me out.
SOUND: LOW GROWL, HEAVY FOOTFALLS
DRAGON: (GUTTERAL AND DEEP) Who dares enter my chamber? You are not armored like the rest and you have the stink of the living. Identify yourselves!
TORRENT: Living? Titania, see if you can locate an illumination panel. I’d like to see our host.
SOUND: ASTROMECH COMPLIANT ACKNOWLEDGEMENT FOLLOWED BY TRACKED VEHICLE MOVEMENT
SOUND: BREAKER SWITCH TOGGLE ON IN REPEATED FASHION TO SIMULATE LIGHTS ON EFFECT
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Uh-oh…
MHARRULA: Oh my…
TRISSEN: Holy Sh…
SOUND: ASTROMECH DROID ALARM GOES OFF TO INTERRUPT TRISSEN
TORRENT: It’s a beast of some kind!
TRISSEN: Gee. What gave that away? The fact that it is the size of a starfighter or did the long, spiked tail and leathery, obsidian-colored wing span give it away?
MHARRULA: Guys! Look at its eyes! They are literally on fire! The teeth! Good God! They are like swords!
TORRENT: The myths are true, then. This crimson creature is of a race related to the Krayt Dragons of our universe. This beast is the parent of that race.
SOUND: AIR BEING REMOVED FROM THE CHAMBER FOLLOWED BY SILENCE
TORRENT: Look out!!
SOUND: A FIERY EXPLOSION
SOUND: ASTROMECH DROID BLARING ALARM
TRISSEN: The flames! They are stopped by a force field! The creature…
TORRENT: is a captive prisoner.
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Oh. A prisoner. Yeah. Of course! (Laughs nervously)
DRAGON: My apologies for the demonstration. It was intended to reveal my low estate. You are foreigners to my realm and are no doubt not responsible for my humiliation. You see? You are quite safe.
MHARRULA: (Nervously) Um, yeah. Safe.
TORRENT: Your eminence, my friends and I are indeed new to this area. We did not expect to find a presence of your magnificence. We also offer our apologies for the intrusion.
DRAGON: You are a polite one. What business do you have here?
TORRENT: We are hunters. Though our prey is of the two-legged kind. An inferior sport when compared to the glory that is you.
DRAGON: Heh Heh Heh. Inferior, indeed! Look upon me, human. None can be my equal. None can consider me to be the sport of any creature!
TORRENT: No disrespect intended, O great one.
TRISSEN: (WHISPERS) Torrent, what are you doing?!
DRAGON: Your prey. Whom do you seek, hunter?
TORRENT: I seek the one named Borsk La’Reth.
DRAGON: (SCREAMS AN UNEARTHLY SHOUT) ARRGH! Borsk! The vile! The filthy worm! The deceiver! May he suffer a long and painful death!
TRISSEN: Oh. So you know him? (Chuckles)
DRAGON: He is the reason I am here! He is the one responsible for imprisonment! He and his metal, soulless men.
TORRENT: Ah, then our goals are of a similar nature?
DRAGON: Yes. Yes, indeed! (Chuckles) Perhaps we can work out a mutual agreement. Release me and I will aid in your ‘hunt’.
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Sounds great! All I need to do here is type in the code on this access panel and…
SOUND: PUSH BUTTON TONES
TORRENT: What are you doing?!
SOUND: AIR BEING REMOVED FROM THE CHAMBER FOLLOWED BY SILENCE
MHARRULA: Not again!!
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Uh-oh.
SOUND: DRAGON ROAR, A FIERY EXPLOSION
DRAGON: Thank you, my friends. Have I mentioned that it has been weeks since my last feeding?
TRISSEN: It. Is. Time. To. RUUUN!
SOUND: RUNNING FOOTSTEPS ON METAL FLOOR, HEAVY FOOTSTEPS OF DRAGON
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Guys! I got this one!
SOUND: JETPACK IGNITES
DRAGON: A flying metal man? Good. I prefer a challenge. Take this!
SOUND: HEAVY TAIL SLAP AGAINST METAL, DRAGON ROAR
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Ha! You missed me, lizard! Can you out run blaster fire?
SOUND: BLASTER FIRE FOLLOWED BY RICOCHET EFFECT
DRAGON: I can do better than that, metal man. Your infantile weapons fire is useless against me. Nothing can penetrate my natural armor, fool!
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Aigh! Time to change tactics and fast! Let’s go for a ride!
SOUND: JETPACK THRUSTS FOLLOWED BY METAL FALLING ON ROCK SURFACE
DRAGON: WHAT?! Get off of my neck!
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Hold still! I don’t want to hurt you, I just want to ride you! Now heel!
DRAGON: Am I a dog that you should give commands?! Very well. Let us see how much of a dragon rider you really are!
SOUND: FLAPPING WINGS AND DRAGON ROAR
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Hey! Look out! That doorway is too small! Aaaaaaah!
SOUND: METAL HITS METAL FOLLOWED BY METALLIC THUD
TRISSEN: We’ve got companeeeeee!
TORRENT: Quick! This way leads to the bridge!
TRISSEN: Good! That gives me an idea! Mharrula, Titania and Torrent. Follow me!
MHARRULA: I hope you know what you’re doing!
TRISSEN: Trust me.
DRAGON: There you are, human! Prepare to die!
TRISSEN: Eat this!
SOUND: BLASTER CANNON FIRE FOLLOWED BY RICOCHET
DRAGON: Lizard man! I come for you!
SOUND: RUNNING FOOTSTEPS ON METAL FLOOR FOLLOWED BY DRAGON ROAR AND VIOLENT WHOOSH
TORRENT: Look! The blast doors to the bridge!
MHARRULA: Titania, get them open and fast before we’re roasted!
SOUND: ASTROMECH FRANTIC BEEPS FOLLOWED BY METAL DOOR SLIDE
B1 GUARD: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Halt! You’re not supposed to be here.
TRISSEN: Heeeeeere’s the dragon!
B1 GUARD: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Huh? What drago…(BEAT) AIIIIIIGH! Guards! Run away!
TRISSEN: You heard ‘em, guys. Let’s move!
SOUND: B1 YELLS FOLLOWED BY DRAGON ROAR
TORRENT: The corridor turns left up ahead! Duck for cover!
SOUND: MHARRULA SCREAMS, A FIERY EXPLOSION FOLLOWS! B1 DROIDS YELL
TORRENT: Are you guys okay?
MHARRULA: Yeah. We made it fine. Can’t say the same for the guards.
TRISSEN: Right. Looks like our dragon friend melted them all down.
B2 GUARD: (B2-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Get up and turn around real slow.
TORRENT: Not all of them it seems.
MHARRULA: There’s so many of them! Too much for us!
TRISSEN: Yeah, for us maybe. But not for him!
B2 GUARD: (B2-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Who?
TORRENT: The dragon, of course.
B2 GUARD: (B2-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Oh, the dragon. Wait. What dragon?!
TRISSEN: This one!
SOUND: HEAVY FOOTSTEPS ON METAL FOLLOWED BY A LOW GROWL
MHARRULA: The staircase to the bridge on the far side…run for it!
TORRENT: Right! Let us pray that this droid army will be too engaged with our friend to bother with us!
B2 GUARD: (B2-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) All droids! Concentrate all firepower on the beast! Aigh!
SOUND: METAL CRUNCHES FOLLOWED BY MULTIPLE BLASTER FIRE AND DRAGON ROAR
SOUND: LIGHTSABER SLASHES, BLASTER FIRE, EXPLOSIONS
MHARRULA: The staircase! We’ve made it! Titania, open the door! This dragon is making its way through the sea of battle droids with ease.
TRISSEN: Impressive! I’ve gotta get me one of those as a pet!
SOUND: R4 DROID BEEPS FOLLOWED BY DOOR OPENING
TORRENT: Good work! Quickly now.
SOUND: FOOTSTEPS ON METAL FLOOR
SOUND: MULTIPLE LIGHTSABER IGNITIONS
TORRENT: Lightsaber droids!
TRISSEN: Awwww Come on!
LT. PAKKA: Welcome to the bridge. My mistress has foreseen this.
SOUND: HOLOGRAPHIC PROJECTOR INITIATES
SOUND: ‘DUEL OF THE FATES’ INTRO
TORRENT: That image. She looks vaguely familiar. Gaunt, pale face with dark markings around the mouth.
ASAJJ: I am the image of your doom, jedi!
MHARRULA: Lieutenant! What is the meaning of this?! You have no mistress but a Trianii daughter!
LT.PAKKA: What?! The Lady Mharrula lives?
ASAJJ: Of course she lives, you fool. Now kill her!
MHARRULA: As much as I’d like to comply you are forgetting something.
ASAJJ: What is it?!
TRISSEN: The dragon.
ASAJJ: You let them release my prized pet, Lieutenant? Borsk! Execute this incompetent!
BORSK: (FROM A DISTANCE) Yes, milady.
LT. PAKKA: No, wait!
SOUND: BLASTER FIRE FOLLOWED BY A THUD
SOUND: HEAVY FOOTSTEPS AND DRAGON ROAR
ASAJJ: Droids! Destroy the creature before it tears this ship apart!
SOUND: BLASTER FIRE, LIGHTSABER SLASHING, DRAGON ROAR THEN YELLS IN PAIN
TORRENT: The lightsabers are having some effect against the beast! Look! He’s lost a limb!
TRISSEN: Watch out!
SOUND: METAL CRUNCH FOLLOWED BY GLASS CRACKING
MHARRULA: The dragon’s just sent that lightsaber droid flying into the viewing window and its beginning to break apart. We’ll all be sucked into the void!
TORRENT: B1-X, plug into the ship’s computers and activated the emergency shields! I will attempt to keep the glass together to give you time! Hurry!
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Roger, roger!
SOUND: PUSH BUTTON TONES
TRISSEN: Mharrula! You and me have a date with this Borsk! Let’s get ‘im while the attention is on that dragon.
MHARRULA: Wait, Trissen. I think that the Lieutenant is still alive.
LT. PAKKA: (GASPING FOR BREATH) Lady…Mharrula…please…forgive me. I was…deceived.
MHARRULA: Your sins are forgiven you. Die in peace soldier.
SOUND: PAKKA DRAWS HIS LAST BREATH, LIGHTSABER SLASHES, THE DRAGON LETS OUT A DYING ROAR, ASAJJ CACKLES IN DELIGHT
ASAJJ: Good. The beast is now killed. Alas, my friends. Your time has come to an end as well. Borsk! Fry these intruders!
BORSK: As you wish, milady!
TRISSEN: Get down!
SOUND: BLASTER FIRE HITTING METAL
SOUND: ASAJJ LAUGHS MANIACALLY
TRISSEN: It’s no good, Mharrula. He has us pinned down. Let’s hope that the jedi has enough of that ‘force’ in him to keep this rig together long enough!
SOUND: GLASS CONTINUES TO CRACK WHILE LARGE SLIDING DOORS SHUT
TORRENT: (LETS OUT A SIGH OF RELIEF) B1-X, good job. You got the emergency door closed in the nick of time. Now, let’s see what we can do to help our friends.
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Wait! I have an idea! It’s time for me to get my own droid army?
TORRENT: Excuse me?
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) This is a droid control ship, is it not?
TORRENT: Well, yes…but…
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) Then there’s gotta be some kind of remote control here on the bridge.
TORRENT: B1-X, that’s brilliant! Get to work. I’ll provide you cover until you gain access!
SOUND: LIGHTSABER IGNITES FOLLOWED BY BLASTER FIRE AND MULTIPLE RICOCHET
ASAJJ: You will never make it out of here alive. Though imprisoned on the planet below I guarantee you that my powers extended even this far. Witness the power of the dark side!
SOUND: DOORS CREAK, SEVERAL SMALL EXPLOSIONS
TRISSEN: I don’t know how she’s doing it but she’s tearing the ship apart herself!
BORSK: No, milady! I will perish as well!
ASAJJ: Borsk, you have failed me for the last time. By leading these infiltrators from the known regions you have destroyed my chance for revenge against Count Dooku!
TORRENT: (TO HIMSELF) Oh my. She still thinks the Clone Wars are active. Just who is she and how long has she been here?
SOUND: PUSH BUTTON TONES
B1-X: (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT) There! This ship’s computer gave a worthy effort at resisting my attempts to take control but I have finally done it! (BEAT) (B1-SERIES DROID VOCAL EFFECT OVER SPEAKER) All battle droids. Attention all battle droids! Abandon ship! I repeat. Abandon ship!
TORRENT: B1-X, I appreciate your concern for this droid army but must I remind you that Borsk is getting away?!
TRISSEN: He’s stopped shootin’ at us and he just ducked into that ready room!
MHARRULA: Let’s get him!
SOUND: ASAJJ CONTINUES TO LAUGH, RUNNING FOOTSTEPS ON METAL, THE SHIP STARTS TO BREAK APART
TORRENT: Wait a minute! Jenna! She’s still with the ship in the hangar! (BEAT) Jenna!
JENNA: What are you guys doing still in there? I pulled out as soon as the hangar started to break apart.
TORRENT: Never mind that! Swing around to the bridge and come pick us up!
JENNA: I’m on it!
SOUND: STARSHIP THRUSTERS IGNITE
SOUND: RUNNING FOOTSTEPS, METAL DOOR SLIDES OPEN
MHARRULA: Trissen! He’s just stepped into an escape hatch! Blast him!
TRISSEN: I thought you’d never ask!
SOUND: BLASTER CANNON FIRE, FOLLOWED BY A SCREAM THEN A THUD
MHARRULA: You weren’t supposed to kill him you stupid lizard!
TRISSEN: What? You said to blast him, so…I blasted him! Not my fault he couldn’t take the hit.
MHARRULA: We’ll argue this later. Quick let’s get into that shuttle and get outta here! Torrent! B1-X! Let’s go!
SOUND: METAL DOOR CLOSES FOLLOWED BY SHUTTLE THRUSTERS IGNITING
SOUND: LARGE EXPLOSION AS THE DROID CONTROL SHIP BREAKS APART COMPLETELY
MUSIC: MUSIC REACHES CLIMAX THEN RELEASES TENSION
TRANSITION: LIGHT MUSIC
JENNA: I sure am glad you guys made it back here aboard the Chainbreaker in one piece. Captain Trissen, shall I set a course back for the known regions?
TRISSEN: Yeah, plot a course for a rendezvous with the Resurgence.
JENNA: You got it, boss!
MHARRULA: When we get back, I need to catch up with those rangers and find my father.
TORRENT: Rest assured, my lady Mharrula, you have your friends to count on to help you in your search for him.
TRISSEN: Yeah, kid. I’m looking forward to meeting this royal dad of yours. He’s bound to show us lots of gratitude for saving him from that Vader guy, if you know what I mean.
MHARRULA: Trissen, you’re such a mercenary!
TRISSEN: Only the best, dear!
SOUND: SHIP’S HYPERDRIVE IGNITES FOLLOWED BY JUMP TO HYPERSPACE
MUSIC: STAR WARS THEME FINALE
Thus ends my kid’s side trek into the Unknown Regions. Next up is Episode IV of the Dawn of Defiance campaign, Echoes of the Jedi!